Tuesday, May 6, 2008

Coachella 2008 by guest blogger Debz

The following is what Debz did over Coachella weekend after she abandoned me to a life of toil in the press tent.

Why do we live in the desert? For the wind? the sand? the 120° summers? No. We live here because once a year one of the greatest music fests in the world comes to town – Coachella - and it friggin' rocks.

Three days of hot sun, stinky sweat and awesome bands. And of course, the people watching. Last year there were many more groups dressed in themes (such as the speedo dudes who supposedly made a repeat appearance). I saw some in Native American headdresses (funny from a distance but annoying if you're stuck behind them in the audience) and some with shirts that had their names on the back and on the front said "Have you seen Fred?," or someone else from their group. The concept is funny if you've been to a ginormous event like this (about 50,000 people a day) where it seems impossible to catch up with your friends (thank goodness texting worked much better than last year). But that's half the fun – with five stages going from noon to midnight, you're undoubtedly gonna wanna see at least a few different bands than your friends. That way you can get back together and mock them for missing the best show of the day.

And it's fun to run around the giant art instillations with friends. There are interactive ones like the Sonic Forest that consists of columns that emanate different sounds when you wave your hand in front of them and the fun Parabola with tons of hanging instruments (see Maggie blowin' hard below). Others provide good shade like the giant Bamboo Waves, the Copper Droopscape and the Steampunk Treehouse with a central climbing tube that reminded me of squeezing into Mayor McCheese's playground head [traumatic for a girl twice as tall as the other munchkins], amongst others. There were also an increased number of tents with A/C and game promos – kinda weird for an earthy, green concert. To boot there was a Heineken dome complete with cute girls passing out swag and a roof that played an endless stream of hypnotic Heine graphics to bring out the beer lover in everyone.

Back to the fashions -- we're talking 80s. As a jeans and t-shirt girl, I'm fairly out of touch stylistically, but I know about the 20 year cycle of fashion and have noticed the 80s creeping back. At Coachella, it was back with a vengeance. Day-glo and gold lamet spandex, boxy sunglasses, TMNT tattoos (he's gotta regret that rebellious 12-year-old choice), but mostly just god-awful clothes that don't match and aren't even thrift store trendy. Our friend Maggie commented that after Day 1 she looked in her closet for something to wear on Day 2 that would fit the trend, but didn't have anything ugly enough. And the music fit, too (80s, not ugly) – the Vampire Weekend preppies, numerous reunion bands (Breeders, Love and Rockets, etc.) and of course, Prince. But enough teasing, let's get to the bands [click on their names to You Tube 'em].

FRIDAY:

Rogue Wave helped kick things off as one of the first bands to play. A great band, but at Coachella bands need to be interactive with the audience in order to be memorable. However, they did have fun with all band members grabbing drum sticks to jam along on the song linked above.

Black Kids is a very cool, bouncy group from Florida. The boys played it serious while the girls got their groove on. A lot of fun in a sparse package.

Architecture in Helsinki are major goofballs of the loud Australian variety. A whole lotta wild, crazy fun as they swapped instruments and jammed in the heat.

Vampire Weekend was the preppie reggae-ish band (I've heard Paul Simon comparisons, which sounds about right on some level) all of the hip kids were there to see. They've been getting a lot of play lately (including an SNL appearance), and they lived up to their hype by putting on a great show. I even skipped watching The Breeders to keep my spot after AIH (supposedly a good move on my part). As rich soccer moms won points by bringing their kids to see VW backstage, I also spied a pregnant Busy Phillips there. Celebs are random but ubiquitous at Coachella. Most keep to the backstage huddle or stray through the VIP area. I barely missed a Steven Tyler sighting, which would have been bizarre.

The Raconteurs know how to rock out, without a doubt. There really is no questioning the talent in this band, and it was awesome to see Jack White, Brendan Benson and company perform.

The Swell Season. I admit, I'm a sucker for Once and their very cute performance on the Oscars. That, and I just wanted to hear Glen Hansard say "tanks" in his Irish brogue. He elaborated on how the award-winning song has gone out of his control, like kicking a ball into a goal – he can't believe it went so far but at the same time he wants his ball back.

Sharon Jones & the Dap Kings. What's fantastic about Coachella is every band has a different groove. You can hear all-out rock, subtle emo or some funky R&B like Jones dished. I skipped headliner Jack Johnson (I have nothing against the Hawaiian green boy, but he became a joke of the fest) to watch Jones pull a willing audience member on stage for a bit of soulful seduction, with the fella's girlfriend happily granting permission.

Black Lips rocked it old school – the crowd was rough and so was the band. Spitting, screaming and tearing the place apart, they weren't done until their guitars were on fire and smashed into pieces. That's the way to end an evening.

SATURDAY:

By Day 2, I'm already feeling old. Blisters on my pinky toes, feet and legs aching, back not doing so hot. Not ready to jump around right away, but the music will change that.

Texting is the only way to keep track of your friends. With friends and husbands working for the paper, I spent more time on my own than with them, so we texted to keep track of each other or to pass along celeb sightings and important updates. Alerting Brian to walking art (such as it was), he replied, "Damn, I'm missing painted boobs?!?!?" Yup, we're that classy.

I snagged the end of Minus the Bear before seeing Cold War Kids do their thing. Like Rogue Wave they were really good (well, better), but just not as memorable in showmanship as other bands.

Cafe Tacuba, however, can put on a show. And this Mexican band has the fans to back them up. Despite the large Hispanic population in the valley, the fest doesn't tap into that market as much as it should. It was the most enthusiastic audience I had seen at the fest so far, and they knew every word (I, on the other hand, could only pick out 1 out of 20 – but that wasn't much different for the bands who spoke English). At one point pintsized lead vocalist Ruben Isaac Albarran Ortega donned a chicken mask and said that people have come to this country to dream, not to do the things they have been accused of. Yet annoyingly, after one particularly exuberant song, the number of guards in the photo pit were increased (thankfully they were thinned out again after the next song). With energy to burn (they even strutted some boy band moves), the band was a blast and encouraged partying without borders.

Death Cab for Cutie was one of the bands I was waiting for. I don't claim to be nearly as aware of cool music as any of my friends, so half the fun of Coachella is discovering new-to-me bands. But this one was a no-brainer, and they did not disappoint.

Rilo Kiley cruelly overlapped with DCC, so I missed the first few songs. But frontwoman Jenny Lewis was on fire and had the crowd hot and bothered. Another overflow of pretty people like VW, but also like them, she deserves all of the attention she gets. The crowd went wild for "Portions for Foxes," which is one of my favorite scream-in-the-car songs.

Mark Ronson, young producer extraordinaire, led his own lively variety show with a guest star nearly every other song – one so excited about being there he climbed the rafters. Ronson rounded up Ricky Wilson (Kaiser Chiefs), Tim Burgess (The Charlatans), Candie Payne, Kenna (the aforementioned climber), Jamie Reynolds (Klaxons), Sam Sparro and Kelly Osbourne. Sienna Miller enjoyed the show next to me and apparently there were quite a few celebs backstage, including the Hoff (hey, he's gotta take a break from his German fans sometime).

Portishead. I know this was the big reunion everyone was crazy about, but I was just getting a spot for Prince. Their songs are fine, but they remind me of my dreary Depeche Mode days in junior high, and after a few songs I kinda wanna cut my wrists. But they were good n' dark as expected, and the crowd was excited.

Prince. One of the other bands commented that much of the audience was probably conceived to a Prince song. Ah, I felt old. I have to admit, when I heard Coachella shelled out $4.2 million to grab Prince after many failures to do so, I was surprised. The headliners are always a little odd compared to the rest of the lineup, but this 80s pop royalty just didn't fit. However, all my music geek friends were going mad at the prospect, so I figured it'd be a good time. And it was.

Without a doubt, the man is a diva. He didn't allow any photographers in the pit and even the crowd was told to put cameras away (though the guard who passed along the message shrugged his shoulders as he said it). [I also tried to snag a YouTube video taken at Coachella, but they've already been disabled.] Prince started late despite the local noise ordinance laws that cut the event off at midnight (he closed the show after 1 a.m.) and repeatedly yelled at the audience, "What's my name?!" Despite his preening, he can work his guitar, which is easy to forget behind all the glitter. He began the show with an 80s flashback by havin' Morris Day of The Time kick out "Jungle Love" and Sheila E. jam to "The Glamorous Life" (during which I got a text from Maggie saying, "F yeah sheila e"). But after all the glam, he also pushed an anti-war message to his worshiping minions.

Prince kicked a few covers including "Come Together" and the odd but somewhat fitting choice of "Creep," and his accompanying ladies sang Sarah McLachlan's "Angel." The rest was the best of Prince (minus "Raspberry Beret" and "When Doves Cry"), of course with "Purple Rain" bringing down the house. There's something about a performer's big song that has 60,000+ people singing together that's quite a rush. That, and hearing Prince say, "Co-a-chella, I'm here!"

SUNDAY:

I can't remember the last time I've slept so hard, and we're definitely feeling two days of rockin' out. Good thing a pack o' Swedes were waiting to wake us up.

I'm from Barcelona. Getting ready for this giant Swedish band to kick it in gear, I get a text from Maggie who snagged a backstage pass this year (though we discovered, not the super special backstage pass – she wasn't allowed to eat with the stars): "Ha ha. I'm in photo pit." Always rubbing it in. But no worries, as this was one band that played for the audience. They began the show by tossing giant red balloons and colored confetti onto their fans, and jumpstarted the love by singing, "I have built a treehouse, nobody can see us, it's a you and me house." Wonderful. Definitely a band to see live (if only to see their superhero in red controltop pantyhose and cape), and you can't help but feel like the world is a big, happy place by the time they finish, especially as you join their conga line through the crowd.

Duffy. Maggie convinced me to check out the cute little soulful package that is Duffy. She's got lungs, but after IFB, it didn't grab us so much and we headed back to VIP to rest our sad little bodies.

We listened to Stars from the VIP area and watched questionable "stars" like tiny David Faustino being accompanied by girls a good foot taller than him and Corey Feldman (sans Haim) hangin' out by the bar. May have seen others, but it was hard to discern the wannabes from the actual celebs.

Gogol Bordello. It was decided that this band is the IFB for boys. Whole lotta fun (one friend appropriately described it as a musical circus) with klezmer-gypsy influences and a definite crowd pleaser, but at this point in the game it just felt like too much after their fourth time at teasing the end of the show. The boys, however, all raved the band as a highlight of the fest.

Sean Penn got on stage for the second time to beg folks to get on his bus the next day for a trip to a Katrina-hit site to help out humanity. Apparently Dirty Hands Caravan would include Ben Harper at the campfire each night and free room and board. Why didn't I go? I'm not sure. Though his plea was more convincing this time without the mention of shrinking glaciers and raped babies that apparently found its way into his first speech earlier in the day.

I missed a band everyone was looking forward to – My Morning Jacket. I was just too damn tired and needed to eat and rest my legs. They sounded great from the VIP tent, which is nice for a) couches in press tent, b) slightly better chow, c) more likely to have celebutard sightings, and most importantly d) cleaner bathrooms (the portapotties get pretty ripe). Maggie informed me that backstage had even better bathrooms, so that's how we rated the access passes.

Roger Waters. I decided to put down my camera and enjoy the show, though I admit I stuck around the VIP tent only because they had a habit of discontinuing access after a certain point in the evening, and I didn't want to get stuck outside while Brian was finishing up working on the web site. In retrospect I wish I got into the crowd, because there were a lot of visuals I missed on the big center screen (though no guarantee I would've been able to see it from the ground), and because the VIP is mostly filled with annoying pretty people who are more interested in schmoozing than listening to the music. And in this case, the music absolutely rocked.

Maybe it's from growing up while being enveloped by the sound of Pink Floyd blasting from my brother's room, but I am mesmerized by Waters. He hasn't lost his edge, and the show was phenomenal. He began with all the big hits, and it's wild to hear thousands of people singing "Shine on You Crazy Diamond" and "Wish You Were Here." After an intermission Waters performed the entire Dark Side of the Moon and capped it all off with encores of "Comfortably Numb" and "Another Brick in the Wall" (which rivaled last year's RATM's "Killing in the Name" for audience participation). Special effects included old school pyrotechnics, a giant graffiti covered floating pig (it said "Don't get led to the slaughter," referring to our politicians) which was ultimately released and a prism complete with a rainbow shooting through the smoke-filled crowd.

A killer way to end a great fest.

Monday, April 28, 2008

Coachella recap

I'm tired, I'm dirty, and Roger Waters' ginormous pig balloon floated away into the desert over two hours ago. So I'm not gonna recount what I saw at Coachella here because I already did on the blog I contributed to for The Desert Sun.

I spent most of the weekend building the paper's photo galleries of the bands and the fans and got several of my own published.

Now it's off to the shower, then to bed because the whole music festival cycle kicks up again next weekend - same time, same place - with Stagecoach, the country music equivalent of Coachella. I'm not a huge fan of country, but it sure as hell beats being stuck at the office.

Thursday, April 24, 2008

Best weekend of the year

Yep, Friday is Coachella, which I am once again lucky enough to attend with a press pass allowing me access to the VIP area.

I have four MUST see bands, and they're spaced out across the schedule, which makes seeing them all possible given that my main reason for having the press pass is to do some actual work. Friday is Black Kids, Death Cab for Cutie and Prince are on Saturday, and on Sunday is Gogol Bordello (I've only heard a couple of their songs, but I'd wager they put on a hell of a live show).

Then there are a bunch of bands I'd like to see, work schedule permitting: The Raconteurs, The Breeders, Rilo Kiley, Vampire Weekend, Tegan and Sara, My Morning Jacket, I'm from Barcelona (to see how they fit 29 people on the fairly small Mojave Stage), Datarock, Islands, Minus the Bear, and although I'm not really a fan, I'm down for seeing Roger Waters performing all of "Dark Side of the Moon." I'm also curious about Sean Penn's appearance; the rumor is that he will be joined onstage by Eddie Vedder to perform some of the "Into the Wild" soundtrack. Some of it was set and filmed just down the road by the Salton Sea so you never know.

Here's the lineup - who else do I need to see?

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

An improved movie-going experience

Tonight I attended a screening of "Be Kind Rewind," the new movie about two New Jersey guys (Jack Black and Mos Def) who film cheap remakes of classic movies. See, I say "new" because it's not actually out for the general public to see until Friday.

This was a press screening, meaning only select members of the media (and a guest) were invited - at no charge, of course. However, there's not a lot of press in the greater Palm Springs area so we were the only two in the theater. And let me tell you, partaking of a private screening is a vast improvement over the alternative - when the unwashed masses are there to act like jackasses.

It pays to sleep with a film critic.

Monday, January 21, 2008

The list is out

My first reaction to the 2008 Coachella lineup announced today was "Eh."

Two headliners (Jack Johnson and Portishead) don't appeal to me at all, and the third (Roger Waters playing "Dark Side of the Moon" in its entirety) is novel in the out-of-left-field sort of way, but not terribly exciting to me. At least these headliners should ensure a much more relaxed vibe than 2007's testosterone-fest of Red Hot Chili Peppers and Rage Against the Machine. (As a side note, the only band name my dad recalls from when I was in high school is the Red Hot Chili Peppers. He therefore mistakenly believes Flea & Co. is still my favorite band.)

Unlike last year, when the Decemberists played, there was no band on there I was giddy with excitement to see. Sure, there's the Breeders (even though I think they're sober now) and Death Cab For Cutie. And when the Black Kids offered their songs free online, I dug them quite a bit.

But as I look over the lineup again, I find that I've heard of some of these bands but never actually heard them. There's a bunch more that are completely foreign to me, and now I have to listen to them to figure out who I want to see. And that is the best thing about Coachella: finding the new gems to plug into the ol' iPod. Well, that and the fact that I get to go because of work.

Saturday, December 15, 2007

Missed opportunity

To set up this post, I must first insist that you be familiar with the comedic stylings of the movie "Super Troopers." There's a scene in which two state troopers pull over a driver (played by comedian Jim Gaffigan, a.k.a. the guy with Conan O'Brien in the Pale Force shorts), and one of the cops tries to say "meow" ten times as he writes the ticket.

So this Gaffigan fellow is performing an upcoming show near Palm Springs, and one of the features writers has set up a phone interview. Yesterday afternoon, when Mr. Gaffigan calls at the appointed time, the phone is answered by... Deborah, who transfers the comedian over WITHOUT saying, "Please hold; I will transfer you right meow."

Very few people will get this opportunity, and those lucky few surely only get that one crack at it. Deborah failed to capitalize, and I'm pretty sure she'll experience many sleepless nights in tormented agony.

Maybe she'll feel better knowing that Super Troopers II comes out in 2010.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

'No Country For Old Men'

I don't usually talk about movies. I leave that to the better half.

But last night on the way home from a preview screening of "No Country For Old Men," the new Coen Brothers movie, I couldn't stop yammering about it. It completely blew me away. There was minimal dialogue and even less music, but lots of action in an amazing script. Plus (and I'm not one to notice such things) it was beautifully shot.

As a bonus, star Josh Brolin was on hand for a Q&A session, during which the audience did its best to prove that Palm Springs is filled with dipshits.

Did you like "Fargo"? This one's better. Go see it.

Saturday, November 10, 2007

An even farther galaxy away...

K-3PO? R2-R7? WTF?

Yes, there are some subtle differences in U.S. and New Zealand spellings: "colour," "organisation," "centre." But I would have thought all English-speaking countries would sync up on movie character names. This New Zealand toy store obliterates that theory.

The only explanation I can think of is that K-3PO and R2-R7 were always the iconic droids' intended names. But unfortunately, way back in 1977, Mr. Lucas did not have the alphanumeric technology available to him to sequence those characters together. Finally, in the early 21st century, he can realize his original vision.

Saturday, September 1, 2007

The redemption of YouTube

This guy has earned my ultimate respect and adulation. If asked, I would offer him my firstborn child*.

* Note: Offer valid only if first-born child inherits more of Deborah's genes than mine.

Friday, July 27, 2007

The Simpsons Movie: The Official Review

My pre-screening fear that it would suck and forever stain the series' legacy was baseless. The movie was, in fact, "excellent." I left with a smile on my face (this is an actual photo of me right after the movie ended).

My big question is whether the recurring character that was killed off (with a final twist on one of my favorite catchphrases) will come back on the show. I mean, it's The Simpsons... they tend to "forget" about previous plot lines.

And I must recognize that the movie boasts an Oscar-worthy performance. You heard it here first: "And the Oscar for Best Supporting Actor goes to ... Spider-Pig!" (thunderous applause)

Saturday, July 21, 2007

Revenge of Cedric Diggory

The last Harry Potter book is available now. I've not read any of them, nor do I plan to. But I have seen all the movies, including the just-released "Order of the Phoenix," and enjoyed them a lot more than I expected I would.

But now that the series is complete and the characters' fates sealed, I'm just waiting for some jerkass 24-hour news anchor to bleat out the ending, thereby ruining my future Harry Potter moviegoing experiences. As an advance warning to whichever talking head spoils it for me, I will hunt you down and punch you in the face. You listening, Blitzer?

Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Spiderpig, Spiderpig...

Does whatever a Spiderpig does. 16 more days.

I don't know what happened to Homer's arm. It was like that when I got there. Really. I didn't steal it. What would I do with just an arm?

Wednesday, July 4, 2007

One shall stand, one shall fall

"Celebrate the independence of your nation by blowing up a small part of it." - Kwik-E-Mart clerk

I didn't take this single-appearance Simpsons character's advice today, but I did the next best thing: I went to see enormous transforming robots blow up quite a bit of it. (Note: When it's 117 degrees, outdoor Independence Day activities have a significantly smaller freedom quotient.)

The movie was better than I expected. Lots of action, lots of explosions, a few flashes of actual humor. Took a little long to get into the action (how many not-so-subtle clues do we need that the banged-up Camaro the kid just bought is really Bumblebee?). But once it got going, it kept going until the end. I give it the ol' thumbs up.

I even did research to prepare. A couple nights ago, I watched the animated Transformers: The Movie. I'd never seen it since my Transformer-collecting days had ended by 1986, when the movie came out. Good thing I held off a viewing until I became a mature adult because who knows how much therapy I'd need after watching my entire toy collection get killed off in one 84-minute span. And even at 32, I'm still a bit traumatized that one of the characters yells "Oh shit!"

Sunday, June 24, 2007

I must look like Wes Anderson

Twice this weekend, as I was hanging out on the street waiting for Debz to come out of a screening at the L.A. Film Festival, someone asked me if I was a filmmaker.

I don't even own a camcorder. But apparently, I either look like someone who should be a filmmaker or someone who actually is a filmmaker.

I told these hopeful starseekers that I was not in the biz, although had I sensed the opportunity to score free stuff by answering in the affirmative, I may have chosen that route.

I like free stuff.

Sunday, June 3, 2007

They don't even have a gorge

So the good souls of Springfield, Minnesota have decided they want no part in a contest that declares the winner the official home of the Simpsons. They probably don't need thousands of Homer fans flocking there because the town's prime location in the middle of miles of cornfields in southwest Minnesota already has them overrun with tourists and their pesky dollars.

I really hope it doesn't suck. The Simpsons movie, I mean. I'm almost as big a Simpsons apologist as Morgan is for Mr. Lucas and his butchered prequels, but even I have to admit the quality of recent seasons has slipped. The movie almost surely will suffer from the same problem as the Seinfeld finale and Episode I: failure to live up to the incredible hype. I have hope that, unlike the two cited examples, The Simpsons movie at least will be decent and not a horrid, legacy-staining turd.

"Who knows what adventures they'll have between now and when the show becomes unprofitable?"

- Troy McClure (R.I.P.)

Monday, May 28, 2007

Sweep the Leg, Johnny

At the outset of this glorious but two-day-too-short Memorial Day weekend, we headed for picturesque Pioneertown. I assume it's picturesque. I've never seen it during the day, and it's in the middle of nowhere in the high desert and when it's dark, it's pitch black.

So back to Friday night, and the scene at Pappy and Harriet's. We were there to see No More Kings perform. You've never heard of them by that name, but you have heard of them as "That band with the 'Sweep the Leg' video with Danielsan and the Cobra Kai." So they come off as a novelty band obsessed with 80s pop culture.

We figured if they weren't any good, at least Pappy and Harriet's has awesome chili.

They turned out to be a blast to see live. And even though there was only 15 people in the place (including us), they gave it their all. Even better, they sat next to us to eat dinner while the first band was on. I'd probably never initiate a conversation... but our friend Maggie will. She used the classic "I did that interview with you for the local paper" icebreaker to lure Pete, the singer, into a conversation with us. He was friendly and funny. Then Maggie put me on the spot by recalling a goofy conversation from a couple days ago.

"What was that song idea you were telling me would be perfect for Pete?" she asked me.

Thanks, Maggie! I was about to sound like a complete dipshit in front of someone who was once, albeit briefly, a certified Internet celebrity. But I couldn't think of a lie that would sound better. "Oh... uh... It's called 'Cats for Dinner.' You know, from 'Alf'? Because Alf liked to eat cats..."

But instead of calling me a nimrod, his eyes widened and he got excited. "I've been looking to write an Alf song!"

Maggie suggested he try the chili, which he did, and then write a song about that as well.

After their set, we were talking with Pete and a couple other band members, and they were all really cool. As they were leaving, each one shook all our hands and thanked us for coming. They deserve success, and I hope they go far and don't become one-hit wonders. Also, I want my Alf song to see the light of day.

Sunday, May 6, 2007

Mmmm... cheesy melt...

The commercials for whatever new burger Wendy's has uses "Blister in the Sun" as the soundtrack.

Do the execs at Wendy's have any idea of what that song is about and therefore, why they might not want it associated with their new sandwich?

I'm going to assume... no?

Monday, April 30, 2007

Only 364 days till the next one

This was my Coachella experience, in chronological order: Satellite Party, Jesus and Mary Chain, Sonic Youth, Fountains of Wayne, the New Pornographers, the Decemberists, some (but not nearly enough) of Arcade Fire, Red Hot Chili Peppers, the Feeling, Rodrigo Y Gabriela, Willie Nelson, one song from Crowded House (I happened to walk through during "Don't Dream, It's Over"), Lily Allen, Teddy Bears and Rage Against the Machine. I had never seen any of them live before.

Debz and I squeezed into the front row for one band (see photo). Guess which one? If you need a hint, you aren't very bright, but you can check out the illicit video Maggie shot during the show or their war against Christmas, a collaboration with Iggy Pop, who was rumored to make a guest appearance last night but didn't. How freakin' fun would it be to do this for a living?

Top three: Decemberists, Teddy Bears and Rodrigo Y Gabriela. Honorable Mention: Jesus and Mary Chain, New Pornographers and what little I saw of Arcade Fire (which is why they're only honorable mention). Duds: absolutely none.

The other cool thing was access to the VIP area. The press tent offered a place to sit and rest, free bottles of water, a WiFi point, proximity to surprisingly clean (and air conditioned) bathroom trailers, and a great vantage point for artist-watching. I picked out Perry Farrell, Colin Meloy, Andrew Bird, Patton Oswalt, Felix Da Housecat, two-fifths of Fountains of Wayne and several others whom I couldn't identify but were giving radio interviews or being photographed so they must be important.

Then, and this is purely for Betsy's benefit, there was the mini-parade of celebutards: Tara Reid, Cameron Diaz and Paris Hilton.

There's more, but I blogged it for work so read it there. Yes, I actually did fit some work in there. Don't worry... I kept it to a "bear" (groan) minimum.

Sunday, April 29, 2007

At Coachella

It was 3:30 p.m. when Fountains of Wayne wrapped up on the main stage, and it was about 103 degrees at that moment. My only thought was the tub filled with free bottles of water back at the press tent.

When I arrived, I zeroed in on the tub, which was stuck in a corner next to a couch. I didn't even look at the man sitting on the couch. As started to step over him, he said, "There's no more water in there. It's over there," and pointed a few feet away.

"Thanks," I said to Colin Meloy of the Decemberists.

About three hours later, he and his band put on one of the finest musical performances I've ever witnessed:

I'd write more and offer a few more pics, but I'm tired and only two-thirds of the way through the fest. I'm contributing to a blog for work so you can read that instead.

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Tough decisions

What kind of insane sadistic ass approved the set times for this year's Coachella?

Scheduling the Decemberists and Andrew Bird at the same time on different stages on Saturday? That's just cruel.

Shafting the Lemonheads by playing them Sunday against the Rage reunion? No way anyone in their right mind misses that.

To all you sorry sacks not in the California desert this weekend, I look upon you with pity and sorrow. And a little bit of disgust.

Sunday, February 25, 2007

Oscar buildup

I'm so happy today is the Oscars. Not because I'm excited about the Oscars themselves. I'm not. I'm excited because after the show is over, Deborah once again will be willing to participate in non-movie-related activities.

For the record, the only movie I saw in 2006 that really made me step back and say "Wow!" is nominated in a couple of categories, but not for Best Picture. I'm going to root for "The Prestige" to take the honors in a surprise Academy write-in campaign.

Friday, January 5, 2007

Goal: To Make Morgan Jealous

I spent last night with a Naboo queen.

Ok, so I didn't actually meet her; I just was in the same room . And it wasn't actually a Naboo queen, of course, but the actress who played the role. She also starred in "Outsourced," which was screening at the local film fest, and the reason fate brought her to my general vicinity was to taunt Morgan.

She was quite fetching, even sans royal makeup, and she remains a beloved figure in the Star Wars universe for ordering the fatal hit on Jar Jar. The official word is that she did it to end his habit of constantly fucking everything up, but everyone knows she had him offed due to sheer annoyance.*

* This may be a backstory I invented for the character 15 minutes ago and may not be an official part of the Star Wars expanded universe.

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

The review

So yeah, I drank the Kool-Aid. I went to see Snakes on a Plane last weekend.

Honestly, I didn't know what to expect as it started. I know that sounds stupid, given the title. Of course I knew there were going to be snakes. They were going to be on some sort of flying transport device. And Samuel L. Jackson was going to be dropping 13-letter words you wouldn't say in front of Grandma. But was it going to be so-bad-it's-good or just plain bad?

It was ... surprisingly good. Like, a real thriller. The movie had moments in which the rolling of one's eyes is appropriate (say, when an unsuspecting male visiting the john becomes one of the snakes' first victims). But it also knew when to take itself seriously. Most of the snake attacks were downright vicious, and the climax was actually suspenseful, even though the characters piloting their way to the end got there via a highly unlikely (yet rather amusing) set of circumstances.

I didn't see the movie for stellar dialogue (there wasn't) or well-developed characters (they weren't) or Oscar-worthy acting (it damn sure wasn't); I went to have a good time. And damn if Snakes didn't entertain the crap out of me. That's all I wanted. Thanks.

Saturday, August 12, 2006

It's raining so what else am I supposed to do?

Even though my recent quibbles with my ISP are over, right now there are a handful of sites that won't load. The servers hosting these sites just don't respond. I ping them, and nothing gets through. Chris' site is one. Another is the Apple Store (this is probably a good thing since I was checking to see how much a refurbed MacBook would cost me).

However, most troubling is my inability to instruct Samuel L. Jackson to yell at people until they agree to see Snakes on a Plane. (Or SOAP, as the cool kids call it). I'm not sure this thing works anyway. Both Chris and Morgan sent me a message, one to my work phone and one to my cell, and neither ever came, although Morgan claims he got a call.

So I tried other features on the official SOAP web site. (Yes, I consider myself a cool kid.) The domain fell under the "Sites that actually work" category so I was able to hear the theme song by Cobra Starship, which may be the most annoyingly catchy song I've ever heard. As an added bonus, the accompanying video is appropriately cheesy and kicks off with the best Samuel L. Jackson quote ever.

The brilliant marketing folks behind this movie have brainwashed me. It's probably gonna be awful, but I'm seeing it.

Monday, July 17, 2006

Skidmarks on your soul?

In continuing with my inane movie clip theme, I bring you this ad from 1983. It was an era when a movie proved that cute little bears can bring down a technologically advanced evil empire. An entire nation was under the spell of a blinged-up badass shouting "I pity tha fool!" I was learning long division and that no human being could out-yell Mrs. Holecek, my third grade teacher.

And a radical new video game was infiltrating the country's youth. It was called Pole Position, and if this commercial doesn't want to make you scour Ebay for a 2600 console, I don't know what will.

Aspiring ad executives take note... this has perhaps the most attention-grabbing opening line in television advertising history.

Saturday, July 8, 2006

That rug really tied Castle Grayskull together

Not sure why Skeletor & Co. speak for The Dude, Walter and Donny at the beginning, then switch over to the Nihilists about halfway through. But I'm willing to give the guy who edited this some creative license.

I caught a the end of "The Big Lebowski" on Comedy Central last night. Hearing Walter say "Gosh darn" and "they peed on your foolin' rug" just feels wrong. Don't know why they bother.

Thursday, May 18, 2006

Question

Where the hell were all these outraged Christians when "The Da Vinci Code" was rocketing up the best-seller lists?

Seriously. This one isn't rhetorical. The article even claims: "Some of the most contentious aspects of Brown's novel have been softened in the movie version of 'The Da Vinci Code.'"

So why weren't they protesting in front of every Barnes and Noble in the South during the time when seemingly everyone in America (except me) read the novel?

Saturday, April 1, 2006

13 minutes, 53 seconds

That's how far I made it through "The Aristocrats" before leaving the room. It was utterly retarded and apparently not going to get any better. As it turns out, my tolerance for comedy featuring incest, poop in a bucket and dead grandmothers covered in various bodily fluids is not that high. That's what I learned about myself today.

The joke isn't even remotely funny, which I guess is part of the point, but would you sit through 90 minutes of a painfully unfunny comedian? Judging by the success of Larry the Cable Guy, I suppose a surprising number of Americans would.

I don't think Debz is all that entertained either, but, trooper that she is, she appears determined to slog through the entire thing. (It's still playing as I write this.) Although I can't see or hear the TV from my desk, I can see her sitting on the couch. Occasionally a grimace interrupts her stoic expression. Watching this is infinitely more amusing than the movie itself.

Thursday, February 16, 2006

If iPods are outlawed, only outlaws will have iPods

This is funny.

This is not.

It's like the RIAA is trying to piss people off enough so they throw up their hands and go back to pirating music instead of paying to download it legally.

RIAA: Take the princess and her CDs to my ship.

Consumers: You said they'd be left on her iPod under my supervision.

RIAA: I am altering the deal. Pray I don't alter it any further.

Consumers (under breath): This deal is getting worse all the time.

(Thanks to Morgan for the "This is funny" link.)

Thursday, January 26, 2006

Warning: Old man post a-brewin'

Back in my day, movies were three for a nickel, plus you got two cartoons and a newsie. And people paid to watch the picture, not play kissie-face in the back row. Kids these days...

I'm excited to see that Steven Soderbergh and Mark Cuban are releasing their new movie almost simultaneously in theaters and on DVD. I don't know what "Bubble" is about or if it's supposed to be any good, but if it paves the way to quicker DVD releases, I'm a fan of it.

Of course, movie theater owners are blackballing it. I guess I can't blame them, because if it becomes the norm for movies to be released in theaters and on DVD at the same time, I would never step inside a theater again.

Some people say they like the movie theater experience. I, however, can't stand it. On Hilton Head, we have to deal with shaky sound, a jumpy picture and on occasion, the projector just breaks down. Bluffton finally opened a decent theater, but you still have to put up with the people who talk or use cell phones. And thank you, sir, for giving me a sixth opportunity to remove my feet from that pile of Goobers coating the floor, but do you think you could take care of all your business on this pass? Then there are the parents who use the movies as a babysitter. I wonder if the parents who bought six 8-year-olds tickets to "The Chronic-(what?)-cles of Narnia" last Saturday knew they ended up sitting (and talking) next to me in "Underworld: Evolution."

I'm going to see "Syriana" tonight because Debz is afraid it'll be gone from theaters tomorrow. I'm going reluctantly because it's at one of the crappy island theaters. I'm going at all because I really want to see it, and because we're stopping at Mellow Mushroom first. And I let Debz go to "Walk the Line" by herself last night, even though I'd love to see it, because it's only playing at Northridge, and I refuse to give that pit another dime.

So yeah, once they start releasing movies on DVD right away, I'm springing for a big flat-screen with surround sound. And it probably won't cost me too much more than two tickets, a large popcorn and two Cokes at a theater.

Saturday, November 5, 2005

Food for thought

I've heard rumblings that my loyal readers have been starving for updates. So as not to disappoint, I offer the following...

Discuss: The Office (U.K.) vs. The Office (U.S.)

The Office: BBC

[Gareth's phone rings. He puts it on speaker.]

Gareth: Gareth Keenan. Hello.

Ange: Hi, baby. It's Ange.

[Tim, Dawn and Rachel all look up.]

Gareth: [embarrassed] All right.

Ange: Are you coming round tonight?

Gareth: I can't. I'm going up Chasers with the lads.

Ange: Oh, come round first. We'll have a bit of time together.

Gareth: All right.

Ange: Have some fun.

Gareth: Yep. Okay.

Ange: Are you going to bring the toys again?

[Gareth, embarrassed, hurriedly picks the phone up.]

Gareth: Erm, Yeah... okay... yeah... look forward to... doing it to you too. All right, bye.

[Gareth puts the phone down. There is a stunned silence.]

Tim: The toys?

Gareth: Shut up.

Tim: What are the toys? Is it Buckaroo? It's not Boggle, is it?

Gareth: Shut up.

Tim: If it's Kerplunk, I'm coming round.

Gareth: It was a private phone call, so...

Tim: Well, don't put it on speakerphone then, Gareth.

[Turns round to talk to Rachel.]

Tim: Yeah, the Jolly Farmer sounds good...

[Turns back to Gareth.]

Tim: Is it Hungry Hippos?

The Office: NBC

Dwight: The problem, Jim, is that people who are really suffering from a medical condition won't receive the care they need because someone in this office is coming up with ridiculous stuff. Count Choculitis.

Jim: Sounds tough.

Dwight: Why did you write that down, Jim? Is it because you know I love Count Chocula?

Wednesday, August 31, 2005

Farewell, Admiral Ozzel

Michael Sheard, who played Admiral Ozzel in "Empire Strikes Back" died today. He will be remembered for his unfortunate decision to bring the Imperial fleet out of hyperspace too close to the Rebel base in the Hoth system. But he got his own action figure out of the deal, which is more than I can say for any of you.

Sheard also was the actor who played Hitler in "Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade," which was only one of FIVE times the dude ended up with that role. He also played Himmler three times and "various other Nazi-era Germans." Worst. Typecast. Ever. How must it have felt to be the guy Hollywood turned to when it needed someone to play one of the most evil men ever to walk the planet? And remember, Admiral Ozzel was evil, too, which was sometimes overshadowed by his incompetence.

Monday, July 11, 2005

Satan is my motor

It was pretty sad when the three people in the car could only scrape together $2.82 in cash to pay a $3 parking garage fee.

(Henceforth for the purposes of this post and this post only, "we" = me, Debz and Sara.) We were heading to see Cake at the Atlanta Underground on Saturday. As I pulled into the parking garage, all three of us simultaneously announced, "I have no cash." I checked the rearview mirror, and a substantial line had formed behind the car, leaving me no choice but to move forward to face the wrath of the parking garage attendant.

We scraped together all the cash we had, about $2 of it coming from Sara ("It's a good thing I didn't buy that candy bar at work today"), leaving us 18 cents short. I offered our pittance to the attendant, who chose that precise moment to do her good deed for the day and passed us through. I hoped someone did something nice for her later that day. I would have tipped her, but ...

And Cake was excellent. The concert was one of those free outdoor deals and one hell of a bargain at 94 cents each.

Thursday, May 19, 2005

Now THAT'S more like it

The new Star Wars movie is awesome.

It's been 22 years since I've said that and actually meant it. I said it in 1999 after I saw "The Phantom Menace" for the first time, but I was really just trying to convince myself of something that wasn't true. I didn't bother after "Attack of the Clones."

While "Phantom" is too much of a kiddie movie and the huge droid armies make "Clones" too sterile, it's worth slogging through them both to get the payoff in Episode III. Seeing the birth of Darth Vader is incredible. Go see it. I will again.

WARNING: Spoilers in comments! If you click to read the comments and learn plot points you didn't want to know, you have no one to be pissed at but yourself.

Sunday, May 15, 2005

A disturbance in The Force

I like Star Wars as much as the next guy (unless the next guy is Morgan, then never mind). I already have my ticket for the first midnight showing of Episode III. I still have all my Kenner action figures from the original trilogy in the next room, safely tucked away in a C3PO carrying case. I'm even a faithful reader of Darth Vader's blog. (Thanks, Will!)

But this boggles the mind. It's just so horribly wrong on so many levels.

Monday, March 14, 2005

Third time's the charm

The Episode III trailer is now online. And despite many grumblings about Eps I and II, both by me and the rest of the world (except for Morgan), when condensed into a 3-minute short that reveals no major details of the plot we already essentially know, Revenge of the Sith looks really fucking cool.

Of course, I remember feeling the same way about Episode I's trailer as well, but that was probably just excitement over the first Star Wars movie in 16 years. But if Episode III makes the same leap forward that Ep II did from Ep I, then it'll be a pretty damn good couple of hours.

Monday, February 28, 2005

That's just a little bit more than the law will allow

This is the perfect example of what makes America great.

Someone, somewhere is gonna make $100K for this. What a country!

Sunday, November 7, 2004

Don't be readin' m'mind between 8 and 9 ... that's Willie's time

Sunday is the most important day of the week for me, but not for the same reasons it's important to the rest of this country.

Nor does it have anything to do with the Bears' stunning upset of the hated New York Giants today (although that was pretty sweet).

No, the reason Sunday has been circled in red on my calendar for the past 16 years is, of course, The Simpsons. As some people know, I'm not to be bothered with conversation, phone calls or fire alarms during new episodes. Until recently, The Simpsons was the only show that reached that lofty status. Now there's a second: Arrested Development. It's on at 8:30 (Eastern) on Sunday, right after Homer and Co. Please watch... it gets (and deserves) awesome reviews. But for some reason, it gets low ratings. And we all know what grim fate awaits most of those shows, especially with Fox. But if you're stupid, don't watch because there's no laff track to let you know when it's funny.

This is why I didn't answer the phone when you called tonight, Vicki. Sorry.

Thursday, September 30, 2004

BNL-TV

Thanks to Debz for pointing out that the Barenaked Ladies are going to be hosting their own variety show.

I have to admit, as a rabid BNL fan, I'm not sure about this new venture. Yes, BNL is funny as hell when they improvise in concert, but that doesn't necessarily mean they will translate very well to a scripted TV show. Case in point: Wayne Brady. He can be hilarious on "Whose Line is it Anyway?" but how long did the "Wayne Brady Show" last? Not very long, but it probably still ran longer than it should have.

BNL may very well pull this off. I hope they do. Unfortunately, they're gonna be on Fox, so even if the show is good, it'll be bumped around the schedule until it dies, and the Ladies can join Andy Richter in the Fox Broadcasting Screwed Me Over Support Group.

Tuesday, September 21, 2004

TK421, why are you at your post?

When I was 4, I got my first Star Wars figure: Greedo. Even though he's onscreen for about 3 minutes before Han Solo caps him, for some reason I thought Greedo was the coolest figure out there. Maybe it was the green mohawk. Greedo took his share of abuse over the years ... he has drowned in lakes, been buried in the dirt and taken more than his share of suicide leaps from bridges. But I've still got him, and about 80 other figures, trapped inside their C3PO and Darth Vader cases.

Now I'm about to sit down in front of the Star Wars DVD. I really have no problem with the tweaking Lucas has made since the originals. They're mainly cosmetic; they don't change the story or the characters. The Jabba/Han scene in "A New Hope" probably is unnecessary since Jabba makes a much more powerful debut when the droids appear before him in ROTJ. But it's no big deal. The one change that bugs me is the replacement of the old Anakin with Hayden Christiansen next to the holograms of Yoda and Obi-Wan at the end of ROTJ. Why dump the newly redeemed Anakin with the young brash Anakin who is slipping into the Dark Side? Makes no sense, no matter how hard Lucas tries to explain it.

But the trilogy is Lucas' baby. I can spare him a few minor changes as long as it doesn't negatively impact the story line. The only question I have is how could anyone give Boba Fett such a raw deal in the end?

Wednesday, July 7, 2004

"Fool me twice and ... uh ... um ... you just can't do that ..."

After watching "Fahrenheit 9-11" last night, I can't imagine how anyone could possibly vote for Bush.

People have accused Michael Moore of releasing a hatchet job on the Bush administration, and yes, there is some creative editing, a few quotes out of context and a couple of over-the-top moments. However, it's tough to ignore the fact that 80% of the film is archival news footage of members of the Bush administration.

The most horrifying thing of all is how ridiculous Bush looks in the first half of the film, the pre-Iraq half, when he's sputtering out sentence fragments and ... and then it's chilling at how quickly the tone changes.

Then when I got home, I saw an interview with Ralph Nader on The Daily Show. As usual, I liked what I heard from him, but I can't vote for him this year. Nader claimed on the show that he mostly siphons voters away from the Bush camp, and I hope that turns out to be true. He did say, when asked if he'd rather have Bush or Kerry win in 2004, "Anybody's better than Bush."

Saturday, May 22, 2004

There's cubicle hell in England too

Watched the first few episodes of BBC's The Office on DVD last night and this morning. Damn funny.

Everyone knows people like the ones on the show. (Except for maybe Gareth. That guy's just a freak.) I have had the unpleasant experience of working with a David Brent, the boss of The Office. It is unfathomable to me how there are so many people like that who manage to keep climbing the corporate ladder despite their overwhelming idiocy, insensitivity and incompetence. Fortunately, what's eye-gougingly aggravating in real life translates to cathartic hilarity in televised fiction.

Wednesday, May 19, 2004

Man on the moon

Great to see Andy Kaufman return from the grave.

Monday, March 8, 2004

Charlotte

Guster - March 6, Tremont Music Hall

Goddamn... when did I become old? We were probably in the oldest 5% in a crowd full of teens.

Tremont is the kind of venue like the Metro in Chicago where the taller you are, the better you can see since everyone's jammed in, general-admission style. It's also much more intimate than an arena, perfect for Guster. And of course, Guster rocked. I thought their drummer's hands were gonna explode during "Fa Fa" ... he was killing the kit. (For those who don't know, the drummer is a conguerra and rarely uses sticks.) Great set list: Amsterdam, Homecoming King, Demons, Barrel of a Gun, Careful, Happier, Backyard, Keep It Together, Diane... just to name a few. I would have liked to hear "Center of Attention," which has some really cool drum parts, but I'm not complaining. They ended (like they did when we saw them in October in Myrtle Beach) by shutting down the amps, hushing the crowd and doing a truly acoustic version of "Jesus on the Radio." Awesome finish.

Set list (from guster.com): I Spy, Homecoming King, Diane, Happier, Bury, Ramona, Backyard, Airport, Barrel of a Gun, Belle, So Long, Careful, Keep it Together, What You Wish For, Demons, Fa Fa. Encore: Mona, Come Downstairs and Say Hello, Amsterdam, Jesus on the Radio.

Barenaked Ladies - March 7, Cricket Arena

The car was hammered by this weird unexpected windstorm on the way there. Tons of branches, leaves and trash blasted against the car while I'm trying to find my way around an unfamiliar area while it's raining in the dark. Always fun, but it spawned one of the Ladies' famed improvs. The arena is this weird hockey rink holdover from the '80s with bright orange paint on the inside and championship banners stretching back to the '50s. BNL made a few cracks about the place as well, comparing their dressing room shower to a torture chamber, which inspired another improv.

I've seen BNL about 9 or 10 times - in college halls, small clubs, arenas and outdoor amphitheaters, and they seem to get better every damn time. They rarely venture down south so the last time I saw them was in 2000 in Minnesota (when Guster opened for them), so I was definitely overdue.

They played a lot from their new CD: "Maybe Katie" was their opener, and they also played Chimps, Upside Down and Second Best. "War on Drugs" was amazing. They also played a lot of obscure (but really great) stuff: Get In Line (one of my faves from them), When I Fall, Just A Toy and a really cool version of "A." They pretty much skipped over "Gordon" completely, playing only the requisite "Brian Wilson" and "Million Dollars," but went waaay back to pre-Gordon stuff like "Night Photographs" and "Roadrunner," which was a very welcome surprise. I was hoping for "Straw Hat and Ol' Dirty Hank," but alas, 'twas not to be. I was a little sad to see they dropped the encore rap/dance, but they've grown out of that. They've only been doing it for about 8 years now.

Set list: Red vs Blue Intro, Maybe Katie, Too Little Too Late, A, Freaky Weather Adlib, It's All Been Done, Another Postcard, Celebrity, Torture Chamber Adlib, Get In Line, I'll Be That Girl, Roadrunner, For You, One Week, Bass Solo, Upside Down, Testing 1,2,3, Just A Toy, Jane, Shopping, Concert Going, Pinch Me, War On Drugs, Beat The Crew, Second Best, Old Apartment, Brian Wilson. Encore: Night Photographs, If I Had $1,000,000, When I Fall.

I really can't hope for anything better than Guster and BNL in the same city on the same weekend. Just don't take 3 more years to get back down here.

Sunday, February 29, 2004

Bitterness belch

Cold's mostly gone. That's a relief. Although I am infected with another illness: being sick of the Oscars. Unfortunately, Deborah has an obsession with the damn thing that can best be described as unhealthy (Chris, Vicki... back me up on this) so that crap has been on our TV all day. Hmmmm... I wonder how soon it will take the host to do a Gollum impression, cradling an award close and calling it his precioussssssss.

Although I am hoping "Lord of the Rings" sweeps everything, mainly because all three installments kicked ass, and RoTK was definitely the best. As an added bonus, I think a LOTR win would really piss off a lot of those high-falutin' pretentious dolts who will say LOTR is an ok movie, but only films should win Oscars.

And by gum, next year I'm rootin' for "Club Dread."

Monday, February 16, 2004

I ask: Why not me?

Last night, Weezy from The Jeffersons did a guest voice on "The Simpsons." Which made me think... "Hey, if Weezy's doing a guest voice, it's gotta be MY turn pretty soon!"

I checked a list of guest voices... Doogie Howser's been on... Ernest Borgnine, Tom Arnold. Suzanne Somers? Gilligan?? For the love of Pete: Brett "The Hitman" Hart!! Jeebus! How long until MY phone rings?!?

Come on, Simpsons producers, it's not like I have any other lifelong dreams.

Sunday, January 25, 2004

My ears are bleeding

I should be used to this. It happens every year at this time. It's when the Golden Globe pre-show crap comes on. Hosted by Joan Rivers. That insane screeching idiot.

And then, just when I thought things couldn't get any worse, they add her demon hellspawn Melissa into the mix.

The cats are yowling in pain and fear. I feel bad for them. At least I can bury my wounded eardrums under headphones.

Sunday, November 9, 2003

The weekend can't be over already

There's no way time can go by that quickly while I do absolutely nothing.

I did see "The Matrix Revolutions" this afternoon. I braced for the worst, considering I haven't read one good review of it. But I enjoyed it. Then I remembered, movie reviewers are drooling idiot lemmings. Whoever's opinion is published first becomes the template for all others to follow. If a reviewer has the nerve to rebel against the crowd, they're banned from the Stuck-Up Movie Reviewer Tree House.

That's really the only reason I can think of why all the critics loved "Bridget Jones' Diary."

Thursday, October 16, 2003

What have I done?

I got rid of my drum kit tonight. Just gave it away like all those egg salad sandwiches my mom made me in grade school that I never liked.

Yeah, it was old. I got it for my 13th birthday, and it was pretty beat up then. Yeah, some of it (hi-hat and snare) was broken. I rarely played it anymore, mainly because it was broken, out of tune and sounded like shit. But it was still hard to give up the old thing. At least Chris is going to try to fix it up and make it playable again. He's invited me to play when he has it finished.

Maybe I shouldn't give up my dreams of becoming a rock star just yet.

Sunday, September 14, 2003

"Once Upon a Time in Mexico"

We went to see this last night, and I'm disappointed with it. If you just look at it as a stand-alone movie, it's decent. Johnny Depp is an incredible actor, and Eva Mendes is one of the hottest women on the planet.

But when you watch the movie in the context of the third segment in the "El Mariachi" and "Desperado" trilogy, it fails completely. There are about six convoluted subplots that are never really tied together, and Antonio Banderas' character -- the Mariachi -- is pretty much banished to secondary status in this one. While the first two in the series are so good because they deal with one man's personal vow of revenge, "Once Upon a Time in Mexico" deals more with the characters' roles in a potential coup to overthrow the Mexican president than the relatively minor revenge plot.

Oh well. Time to look forward to the Coen brothers flick coming out soon.

Wednesday, September 3, 2003

must...stop...buying...

I buy the new Barenaked Ladies single on the iTunes Music Store, and the next thing I know I'm living out of my car.

Ok, I exaggerate now and again.

But that damn store is addictive as hell.

Tuesday, August 26, 2003

DVDay

Yes, yes, I know they just came out today, but I already have in my possession the DVD versions of The Simpsons Third Season and "The Lord of The Rings: The Two Towers."

I wonder when the Simpsons' fourth season DVD comes out...?

Sunday, August 24, 2003

Oops

Ok, the Guster song's not called "Massachusetts." It's called "Homecoming King." That doesn't change its abnormally high rock quotient.

In my defense, it easily could have been titled "Massachusetts." And I'm gonna keep calling it that.

Rock on

I'm listening to Guster's new CD, "Keep It Together" right now. Track #3 ("Amsterdam") to be exact. It rules. "Massachusetts" is even better. They oughta just keep writing about geography. It's melodic AND educational.

Tuesday, August 19, 2003

An epic battle

Much as I hate to admit it, I can't shake the desire to head to my local cinema to see "Freddy Vs. Jason." I saw two or three installments of each franchise on video while I was growing up, and I certainly don't feel like my life is incomplete because I haven't seen "Jason Takes Manhattan." But dammit, I gotta know... who wins? I really hope it's Freddy. He had some decent one-liners as well as creative ways of terrorizing people before killing them. Jason had no finesse; he just hacked away. Of course, I'm sure there will be a "Freddy Vs. Jason, Round Two, This Time It's Personal."

In other movie happenings, I got the chance to see a midnight screening of "The Rocky Horror Picture Show" last weekend. Hilton Head is definitely not the ideal place for a Rocky virgin's first time, although the six people in costume really gave it their all. Now I feel like I owe it to myself to catch a midnight showing in a real city.

Monday, July 28, 2003

A small nugget of joy

While I wouldn't exactly call it "smart," CBS's "Still Standing" is a pretty damn funny show. It's about a working class Chicago couple (one of the dudes from "Full Monty" is in it) with three kids. The kids are kind of pushed to the background to showcase the parents, and the interplay between the two is hysterical at best and decent at worst. It's always on Monday nights, but CBS switches its time slot around a bit.

It's a good thing this one isn't on FOX. They'd just move it to Friday night and eventually cancel it like they did with "Andy Richter Controls the Universe." I simply can't forgive them for that, especially with the staggering amount of other dreck that network airs. I'm still hoping UPN or Comedy Central or somebody picks Andy up. It's the funniest, best written show out there that doesn't contain the word "Simpsons" in the title.

Sunday, July 13, 2003

Major Concert Announcement

Following up on my earlier post about there being little to do in the Hilton Head area... today a local radio station revealed a "Major Concert Announcement."

Every radio station in America makes "Major Concert Announcements." In Washington, D.C., a "Major Concert Announcement" might herald the coming of the Dave Matthews Band or maybe the Rolling Stones.

The "Major Concert Announcement" about the band coming to Hilton Head: the Outfield. Yes, the crappy one-hit-wonder 80s band the Outfield. You know, "I don't wanna lose your love toNIGHT!"

"Major Concert Announcement" my ass.